I know it’s February, but this is going to continue the thread of New Year’s resolutions…so, how are they going? Are you finding ways to be more like yourself? Are you nurturing your true colors? I hope you are realizing what you really want and trying to bring it into your life. 🙂
Way back over winter break I had a lot of time off with my kids while their school was closed. We did fun things, but we also got bored as the unstructured days dragged on. By the time we had to return to school and work, we were ready. My kids might claim they wanted more vacation time, but I certainly didn’t. Why?
Well, as much as we all need to rest and recharge, I’ve noticed that once I get a few carefree lazy days, I’m good. Many moons ago my husband and I went on our honeymoon to an all inclusive resort in Jamaica. We had about a week and did nothing but visit the beach and drink margaritas. It was awesome for most of the time as we were exhausted by the demands of our rather traditional wedding and planning. (I never want to dress shop for formal gowns again!)
While we were there, we met folks from England. They were planning to stay for 2 weeks. First I was shocked by having that much vacation time, then, later, I wondered: What would you do there for two weeks?! I’d be bored out of my mind and ready to get home. For better or worse, that is just how I am!
So it’s January 3rd and I’m ready to get moving. I’m ready to learn and accomplish and achieve and jump into the new year. What met me at the door? A whole lot of nada.
Projects I expected to fire up were delayed. Weather caused some more delays around school and work. Then my mom got sick and I had to spend my free time not “producing” but sitting with her in the hospital for hours on end. It’s like I burst out of the starting gate and slammed right into quick sand or jello – there was no racing ahead for now.
I had other obstacles, too. I am transitioning off a long time medication and it was/is having some odd effects on my body. I had wanted to zoom ahead with working out and healthy eating, only to find myself in a physical transition period that couldn’t be pushed.
More waiting. Damn it, the theme that is emerging for me on every side is Patience! The universe is literally making me cool my heals while all I want to do is race ahead. Insert many other frustrated curse works here !#@$!
I know that in order to better connect to the authentic me (new years stuff), I have to let go of trying to control everything. I love to cajole and find work-arounds and generally keep things in forward motion no matter what the obstacles are. However, at this point, I’m picking up the signal that I have to let things unfold in their own time, no matter how crazy it makes me. This kind of realization is not news to most people, including me, but understanding the concept and being OK with it is completely different!
So here I am, trying hard to be patient, looking for my opportunities to arise for action. And, in the meantime, doing my best to remain calm. Frankly, if I’m going to be treading water, I’d like a few more snow days!
I want to know – is anyone else out there having these kind of experiences? Are you seeing themes, patterns or messages repeatedly coming your way? I’m just curious if anyone else is seeing this too.
I hope whatever IS coming into your life is making you happy and helping you to be your awesome self.