Draw that line in the sand!
Two recent conversations got me thinking about this concept.
1. Someone gave me some good career advice: set your boundaries early! And by this she meant, being a good employee does mean being flexible and doing your best. BUT it doesn’t mean working round the clock and checking your email while on vacation. Make it clear from the beginning and it will be much easier for everyone.
2. A friend recently told me she dyed her hair a wild color. Was she having a mid-life crisis? No, she was just trying to assert her individuality even as she was playing multiple roles in society, most notably wife, mother and employee.
When I think about drawing a line in the sand, I think about the boundaries that I’m not willing to cross, end of story. To know your boundaries, you have to know yourself well and what works in your life and what doesn’t.
As for #1 up there, no I’m not checking work email everyday on vacation or after my kids go to bed at night. As for #2, she is telling the world, I may be a wife and mom, but I am no Stepford wife!
When you come up against decisions and situations, give it some thought…are you OK going down this path? Or are do these things make you uncomfortable? Trust your instincts!
I can only think about one caveat to this issue…and that is the nature of fear. Sometimes fear is very useful because it protects us from harm. But sometimes fear can stand in the way of us having the guts to do great things. Martha Beck put this very well…
“Following our hearts is often scary, but the fear feels clean, and does not spoil the desire or yearning to experience our heart’s desire. Revulsion feels like eating something poisonous. It sickens and disgusts. When you feel fear, simply examine your frightening thoughts until you can see where they may be exaggerated or unfounded. Revulsion is telling you to give certain components of your experience a very wide berth.”
What makes you want to draw a line in the sand?